Are 30 year olds allowed to have Christmas lists? I mean, I write one in Microsoft word every year and decorate it with borders and fancy text and Christmas images pilfered off a quick google search to send to my mom to relay it to Santa! But more and more I feel guilty about asking for “things”.
This tradition started when I was in first year university and my mom asked me to send her a list of what I wanted for Christmas. So in between my studies, I jazzed up a list and emailed it to her. I’ve been doing it ever since and it always seems a little magical around this time of year.
We always had a rule in our household that by the time we hit 25, if my sister and I still lived at home, we’d have to start paying rent. So my 24th Christmas, I had some unrealistic expectations on my Christmas list that year. In between the Burt’s Bees’s chapstick and the DVD requests and Ferraro Rochers, I added “a house with a cute boy in it,”! In March, I met my husband to be, who lived one road ever. Magic, right?!
This time of year is so amazing and even more now seeing it through the eyes of my children! Every time they see a Christmas tree, a twinkling light, or a glimpse of Santa, you can actually see the magic in their eyes.
I love gift giving! I always have a well thought out list of things to buy for everyone, a million errands to run, a bunch of open carts on my phone and a minus bank account and maxed out credit card. Every year I say I’m going to tone it down but it never happens. It’s the best time of year.
I also love getting gifts! #sorrynotsorry and I ain’t afraid to admit it. I’ve always loved it. We were never super spoiled as children but I always, always felt so much excitement Christmas morning and I was rarely disappointed. I can vividly remember one Christmas when Santa brought me a bean bag chair, a black CD player, and the Backstreet Boys first album! You better believe I plopped that bean bag chair beside an outlet, plugged in my big, bulky CD player, set the heavy beast on my lap and let those 5 guys serenade me for the rest of Christmas Day.
Of course I already have my list typed out and decorated this year, because you know, tradition (which is super frustrating because I always remember 5 things I want to add to it) but the more I think about it, the less unwrappable gifts I desire and the more real-life gifts I’m craving! The little things that brighten my days and help me to realize all is well in my world. I am beyond lucky to be living the life I’m living but these little things give me an extra little giddy-up on the worst days.
Are you ready for my top list of wants?
Here it goes:
I really want to wake up in the morning, in the dark, sit on my toilet seat and not jump up after feeling cold, stale toddler pee on the toilet seat.
I would love it if every pocket of an old coat or old sweater or old bag I have found, would have an extra couple of blue, green, purple or red dollar bills inside waiting like the little pieces of treasure that they are.
I really want to be able to lay down in my bed at night, nestle in the gloriousness of super comfy, freshly cleaned bedding and fall asleep instantly. Then, if it’s not too much to ask, I want to sleep undisturbed and wake up feeling refreshed 12 hours later.
I want to wake up in the morning and throw my hair up into a perfect messy bun! Not one with spikes sticking out, or too tight that it’s hurting my brain or too loose that I’ll just have to redo it again in 20 minutes, just the perfect bit of mess.
Better yet, I really just want to wake up every morning with a perfect shiny blow-out and a face full of makeup already beautifully laid out (fresh, not from the night before).
I really want all my dinners to be healthy, prepped, one pan meals followed by one dish to wash.
I want my vehicle to always be sparkly clean with no 5 day old crumbled fishy crackers, spilled coffee or remnants tossed everywhere from a scattered brained mom trying to survive the week.
I want my to-do list to shrink and my “fuck- it” list to grow.
I want unlimited time to do everything I actually want to do. Not laundry or cleaning but doting on friends, working out reading books, getting lost in Netflix episodes and actually paying attention to what’s going on in them!
I want my kids and husband to just listen to me the first time and care what I have to say. Not after the third time, not by the time I’m yelling like a crazy person, not after I give up caring to even speak and not after the fact has passed.
I want to eat McDonald’s and not gain weight! Better yet, I want to not feel a shred of guilt when I feed it to my children as well and I want to just revel in its glorious disgustingness.
But most of all, I want my kids to know they are loved beyond measure and I’m trying my hardest daily to mould them into decent human beings. I want my family to know they mean the world to me and every little favour they do for us does not go without notice. I want my friends to know that even though I fail to keep in touch daily, they are always in my thoughts and I’m always hoping they are thriving and doing well!
Ok, so I know this is an extensive list but I’m just a mom….pleading to Santa…to just shove the wrapping paper this Christmas season… and give us moms what we really want!